Month: October 2011

Web Definitions of “Sexy”

Earlier, I wrote some of my ideas about what is “sexy”. Today, I am looking at what other people think it means.

A definition I read said that sexy means “Arousing desire” and “Anticipation of sexual activity”. Both of these make me think about burlesque performers. Good ones do a great job of arousing desire and teasing about possible sexual activity that might result, even though (unless the performance is a private one for their partner), nothing will happen. She and the audience both know this, but the sexiness is still there.

A great photo site that tries to answer the question is What is Sexy. It is a collection of photos that the web site owner thinks are sexy. I agree with most of his/her selections. I also note that:

  • The subject is nearly always looking into the camera, at least indirectly. This provides more data for my hypothesis that sexiness requires a connection between the subject and viewer.
  • Most subjects are mostly clothed (the site does have a work filter engaged by default). This observation fuels my belief (pointed out first by my wife) that hints are sexier than showing everything. The “tease” is important.
  • Smiling helps, although it is not absolutely required.
  • For me, smoking spoils any sexiness..

One thing I note about this web site is that all of the women are thin. I strongly believe that weight is not a determining factor of sexiness.

Anton Therapy noted that just using the term “sexy” in her blog posts has increased readership. It is a humorous look at society, and worth a read, especially for some of the unusual search terms people have used (“sexy executions”?). All of the photos she posted are of thin women with large boobs, which I think unfairly reinforces the stereotype of what kind of body you must have in order to be sexy. The only one that I think is really sexy is the first one, the one looking into the camera. The others are just pictures of beautiful women.

Dante Feenix (is that a real name?) wrote a blog entry, What is sexy? Because young people don’t seem to know…. He noted that when you dress up to go to a party, you are giving your definition of “sexy”. While I do not think that this occurs all the time (you are attached and going to a party with friends?), I am sure it is true sometimes. He also notes that an attitude of “I’m so much more than you see” is part of being sexy.

At RU Sexy?, they claim that sexiness has three factors image (in particular, self image), confidence, and attitude. They have a “test” you can take to see how sexy you are. How accurate or predictive the test is, I’m not sure.

So, what have you run across that defines “sexy”?

Later additions:
No real definitions, but Gino has good pictures illustrating sexiness.

What is “Sexy”?

Woman wearing a purple shirt and nothing else
Candace in a Purple Shirt

One type of photo that I particularly like is what I call, “Sexy Photos”. This style is similar to boudoir photos, but not necessarily taken in the bedroom (boudoir is French for bedroom). While I am sure that similar observations apply to male subjects, all of my experience to this point is with women.

In going through the photos I have taken so far (not all are publicly available), I have come up with the following observations:

  • Sexy has no age limits. I have met older women who are far sexier than some beautiful models.
  • Sexy has no required body type. I have seen larger women who are sexier than women who are smaller and more classically “beautiful”. Some (but not all) of the women who classify themselves as “big, beautiful women (BBW)” are in this category.
  • Of particular note, big boobs are not a requirement for being sexy. And, a boob job often makes women lo less sexy.

What this really means is that sexy is a state of mind. If you believe you are sexy, you are.

Woman in a cave wearing a bikini and boots, with tree roots hanging down
Roots and Boots

For photos, I have noticed a few other things:

  • When the subject looks into the camera, it makes a big difference. This is not absolutely required (for example, see the photo to the right), but this is true of most of the photos I think are sexy.
  • Sexy is not the same as nude. Many (but not all) nude images are not sexy. Think about artistic nudes. For that matter, very little pornography is really “sexy”.
  • Sexy is not the same as “erotic”. Erotic normally has more sex and less fun as the emphasis. I bet this point is one for debate, because I suspect not everybody agrees with my distinction between the two. Let’s discuss it through the comments.
  • Often there is a tease component to the image, saying, “I won’t show it to you right now, but maybe later.” Contemporary burlesque dancers specialize in this tease part. Many of them are very sexy, and not all are thin.
  • There is often flirting with the camera (and hence, the viewer of the resulting image). I ran across a great book by Violet Blue about flirting, and much of the advice applies to still images as well as being sexy for your special someone.
  • Sexy is fun. The model and photographer should be enjoying the photo session; this shows in the resulting images.
  • Comfort is essential for sexiness. This means both physically as well as mentally comfortable.

Again, it seems to come down to the mental state of the person in the photo. When she believes she is sexy, she is.

If you are interested in having sexy photos taken, check out my sexy photo web gallery and then contact me. I travel a lot, so you do not need to be in Albuquerque.

This topic is one I will be continuing to research, and I am sure that I will have additional blog posts on the topic. Let me know what you think the definition of “sexy” is.

All people appearing in these photos have signed a written release allowing me to use the photos.